Should I Stay or Should I Go?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! My school contract ends in February and I seriously need to figure out what to do with my life. Should I stay in Korea and focus on my life here or should I leave/go home and, you know, start a career and such?

My mother is a Strategist by trade and is currently staying with me in Korea. So when I asked her what I should do her instant reaction was to write everything down in once place and organize it into positive/negative lists (she did this for Korea, life goals, grad school & life partners). Here is what we got for the Korea v. US of A decision.

Korea

Positives

  • Full time AWESOME job with benefits (that everyone wants)
    • 10 weeks paid vacation!!
  • Don't need a car
  • Can save money for the future
  • Continue Traveling Asia
  • Is less of a gamble than America.

Negatives

  • I fear that I will get too comfortable and stuck here
  • Lack of emotional support
    • Tired to constantly saying goodbye to good friends
  • Still don't speak the language and therefore have no idea what's going on most the time

US of A

Positives

  • Being home!!
    • Playing an active part of my loved one's lives
  • Heading toward life/goals/dreams (whatever those may be)
  • Having a fully developed support network
  • Familial Safety Net
  • Grad school?

Negatives

  • It all costs money
    • Health Insurance
    • Car/Car Insurance 
    • Cell Phone
  • Reverse Culture Shock
  • Living with parents will be a challenge 
  • More of a gamble in the job market
  • Means growing up a bit more
So what should I do? I seriously have no idea and would love whatever input I can get!!!

Also this song won't get out of my head...

3 Comments

  1. I would say stay one more year or even another 6 months and really think about what you want to do after korea. Take it from someone who stayed in korea for two years and left, it's no easy task.

    That being said, I wish I stayed one more year saved a little bit more and that way didn't waste time or money when I cam back home.

    If you want to teach in the future it's not hurting your career in the future. All in all what's one more year really? You will find out quickly when you home that you haven't missed much and people are all working 9-5 "career jobs" waiting for the weekend.

    -Adam

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  2. Hi Ashley,
    I too ascribe to your Mom's process of deductive reasoning. Then you've got to take the two lists and score each point to get an idea of which ones really mean more to you. You put two exclamation points after one of them, "Being home!!" Which was in the positive category. I could deliberate each comment, but your other comment, "Not knowing the language and not knowing what is going on most of the time," is very telling. Do you really want to do the work necessary to learn the language? If you do not, then come back home. Put your energy into building full connection, full engagement, and full options - here at home. Being a stranger in a strange land can be exciting, but it can also be as escape from, as you put it, "...growing up a bit more."

    If you feel you want and need to see more of Asia and can use this time to save money and actualize this plan, then by all means see this through while young and while there. If this doesn't "grab ya" then you will know more what to do.

    I appreciate your "brainstorming" possible solutions. As you know, there is no right answer. Sometimes when you don't know for sure the best decision is to wait until the pain of a choice outweighs the pleasure of it - then it becomes much easier to make the choice.

    Best to you honey. Love ya, Pamela Payton

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